I've been coming to meetings for the Battenor Ecological Society for several years. To be truthful, this organization has lost its flair for activism. I don't give the meetings a high priority these days. But when I have free time and need some company,the "after meetings" are still a nice reward.

Over the years, I have mentioned the TDG occasionally at these meetings. Most know I have a "high" position in this group. And I got a few people to join.

For several years, this society has been advocating for a cleanup of an abandoned creosote plant in Riverbend. But sending letters to politicians has not had any tangible result. Our president, Jane Phail, is calling for another round of letters. She will get her wish, but not much will change with these letters.

But I felt this particular cause was worthy. One of the town's bicycle paths skirts this plant, so I see the mess more than I would like. It is an eyesore and smells bad. Maybe the Riverbend TDG can help.

I asked, "Would you like support from the Riverbend TDG?"

This led to a great discussion about the TDG. I got about 10 minutes of undivided attention.

Jane asked, "Can you people really do something for us?"

I concluded, "The creosote plant might be a project for the TDG."

Jane said, "Why not?"

I said, "Well, it still needs approval from our executive committee. I'll get back to you."

Stacey and I were at the truck stop restaurant on another Saturday night.

"Stacey, you really left me with a lot to think about last time we were here. As a teenager, as a first year college student, and as a young office worker in Riverbend, I more or less let my value system develop without much thinking."

"And that's the way most value systems are developed. People take their cues of what is right or wrong, good or bad, from society around them. And if a certain subculture dominates the person's life—or if the person really wants to belong to that subculture, the person will assume its values without much evaluation."

"But I clearly remember the day when I made a conscious decision to leave my subculture. Why could I not have made that decision earlier? I now see those few students who left my dorm also made a conscious decision. What was in me that made me stay so long?"

"That could be several things. It seems you had some of those values already in place, like you really wanted to have sex. So when sex was a major value in your dorm, it wasn't that big of a jump for you to go from monogamy to promiscuity."

"So those students who left had a wider gap in values between them and the dorm. My gap was more narrow. I just let that...cognitive dissonance...fill in that gap."

"That could be. And also the need to belong is very strong in most people. Often there's more than one psychological force creating our values for us."

"Looking back, I was scared of moving to another place. I just didn't see an alternative. I had to fit in.....Those people who left the dorm probably had alternative subcultures to turn to. I couldn't see any alternative."

"Maybe. Remember how you called the leavers as losers?"

"Yeah."

"That was a signal to prove to yourself that you had the right set of values at the time. Those losers were indeed losers—in your mind. By calling them losers, you validated your own newly formed value system-even though you never thought much about that value system."

"So denigrating people who made a wiser choice than I actually reinforced my bad choices."

"Probably. And here's another social validation force at work in your dorm situation."

"Oh, yeah?"

"All those third- and fourth-year students in the dorm had a vested interest in converting you to their value system. If they could convince you to adopt their values, they were validated in their own value system. Had you stayed in the dorm, you too would've likely been trying convert the new students into promiscuity."

"So what you're saying is that we might subconsciously recognize we have a poor value system. But rather than challenge it, we seek to convert other people to it. When we get converts, we feel good about ourselves."

"That's about right. Just one more possibility."

"OK?"

"Some people use pleasure to mask internal psychological pain. A pleasure like sex helps them forget past trauma in their lives."

"Like?"

"Say if someone was abandoned or abused as a child. When such people move into adulthood, they take on various kinds of addictions: alcohol, gambling, promiscuity, consumerism,entertainment. These help alleviate the internal pain they are suffering with."

"I can't say that would be me. I had  a pretty good family life."

"But could you say the same for other members of your dorm?"

"No, I really can't recall anyone admitting to any childhood trauma."

"Well, there were probably a few. And they had a vested interest in converting you to their value system. When they converted you, they felt better about themselves."

"So, in a way, I was a product of their trauma?"

"You could say that."

I had to think about that! How could I have let wounded people lead me around like that?


I then said, "We are prisoners of our own psychology, aren't we?"

"For sure. The paradox is that most of us believe that we have come to the "right" value system through independent and logical thinking."

"So it seems anybody can fall for anything! How do we know when our values are sound?"

"When we challenge our current value system on a continual basis."

"How do we do that?"

"My parents helped teach me about values. They were always asking me questions when I was a teenager. Like: How do these values make me a better person? Or build a better community? If everyone had this value, would the world be a better or worse place? If no one had this value, would the world be a better or worse place? What is the money behind the values?"

"Money?"

"Sure. Haven't you noticed that when our boss runs some advertising in the local paper, business picks up a little?"

"Yeah."

"Well, he wouldn't spend that advertising money if he didn't have to. He watches his business numbers very closely. When his business seems to be breaking even, he advertises. More customers come in. It works for him. He's trying to change the value system of a few people in Riverbend to come to his restaurant. Advertising is mostly about changing value systems."

"But he is just running a business to make a living. I don't see anything wrong with that. My accountant boss does the some thing."

"But are our restaurant boss and your accountant boss setting up a culture for young people to have casual sexual hookups?"

"No."

"But the managers of Ezzie's and Spin City are. They want their places to be known as pick-up places. That brings in young people with those values. And those young people pay a cover charge and buy over-priced alcohol. Without the value system of casual sex, many nightclubs would not last long."

"All those hours I had spent in the nightclubs really hadn't done the world much good."

"But the alcohol industry sure profited. And the night club owners and managers are making a good living. There's often money behind many value systems."

"And they don't really care about the health of their patrons, do they?"

"Nope. It's a strange world that combines pleasure, pain, and peer pressure to earn profit."