I was commenting on a post about a future Supreme Court Member going through his Senate confirmation hearings. I said something like:
“Young women should stay away from frat parties. These parties are engineered by frat boys to score some casual sex. There is a lot of peer pressure for these young men to score. If they can’t convince a young woman to their room, they will use alcohol to hinder a young women’s good judgement. Some will use date-rape drugs. They want stories to tell their buddies the next morning.”
This comment generated two attacks from two female Medium contributors. Apparently, young women should not be discouraged to attend frat parties. If something bad happens to them, it is all the male’s fault.
I retorted that if something bad happens to the young women, it’s often hard to prove a true crime had been committed. The male could claim it was all consensual. It’s best to stay away from these parties and not have that possibility of a life-changing traumatic event, which might sap the young woman’s confidence to succeed later in life.
Then I got called a misogynist for perpetuating rape culture. According to my two Medium adversaries, I belong in the camp of serial rapists.
Am I a misogynist?
My Former Roommate
After university, I needed a quick place to stay as my company was thinking of transferring me here or there. I rented a room in a suburban house. My landlord/roommate, Roy, was a ladies’ man. He probably had sex with 200 different women each year.
Roy was consensual in his affairs. He did not force himself on anyone. But it would not be beneath him to put his hand on a prospect’s knee and suggest: “Let’s go to my place and fuck.” This line worked for him more than a few times, why not try it again? If she said “no,” he dropped her and started hustling some other woman. In these days of #MeToo, Roy would occasionally be facing some interrogation time in a police room.
I often wonder how Roy and his 200 annual lovers would navigate #MeToo. Should Roy’s lawyer contact his prospect’s lawyer with a legal proposal like “My client would like to fuck your client, but your client needs to first sign this document because my client’ direct offer could be construed as making an unwanted sexual advance and this signed document will ensure there is no misunderstanding that his offer, if accepted or not, would not be construed as such.”
Yeesh!
Such a legal document is a moot point. From my internet readings, neither #MeToo nor COVID lockdowns have affected how the promiscuous players find each other and play around. Guys like Roy are setting themselves up for legal problems they would have never had a generation ago; it’s not hard to believe that one out of Roy’s 200 annual encounters goes in a #MeToo way. COVID is perhaps the new venereal disease. But these people probably don’t care.
So am I still a misogynist? How does Roy stack up in the misogyny continuum? Worse than me? Better than me? What about his 200 annual lovers who freely gave their bodies to Roy after knowing him for less than one hour? Are they not sending a signal that other women can be used by men like Roy? By being easily sexually available, are they not contributing to a culture of misogyny?
I had better not ask these questions. I could be put on a #MeToo hot seat again.
Tiered Democratic Governance
As my small Medium following knows, I try to dovetail most of my articles to my alternative democracy known as Tiered Democratic Governance.
I believe that I am bringing up some good points to the discussion and asking some good questions. Yet I am immediately labelled as misogynist, unworthy of having any time on any podium. What are my adversaries so scared of?
The fact that we can’t have a civil discussion on these matters is showing us how democracy is failing us on these complex issues the 21st century is thrusting on us. I don’t have the answers. But we do need honest and frank discussion, which should include listening to the other side.
I believe Tiered Democratic Governance will provide better formal and informal forums to help us sort these issues out.
Until then, I guess we shall continue to play the game of “Whoever shouts longest and loudest wins!”
Published on Medium 2022
Confessions of a Future Politician
